Sorry, I just needed to vent
So, I got up and wrote them all down in a ranting raving letter that I will never give them.
I'm just so upset. I just can't understand it. I'm hurt. I'm exhausted by all of it.
I've been lying here trying to figure out how I ended up in a place where my boss swears at me; where the business manager makes up lies about me and presents them to me in a written complaint and expects me to sign it; how the countless hours of unpaid overtime have lead to accusations that I am trying to cheat and company of time and that I am not to be trusted; how a job that I once liked has turned into one that fills me with a dread I cannot even explain.
Despite the fact that I built my department from the ground up, that I created and implemented most of the clinic's organization systems and office processes, I am accused of being unwilling to do extra work and am called "insubodinate" and am accused of "disobeying a direct order".
Whereas at a previous job, I had keys to the police station and almost unrestricted access to the entire country's police records, I am now told that I am not worthy of trust and under suspicion based solely on paranoia and lies.
Months of 50-60 hour weeks without overtime pay have earned me no leeway and have been completely forgotten. The extra work that I did, not out of the goodness of my heart but as an investment in my future with the company, has been forgotten as well.
And so begins the job search. Again.
I really need to go to bed now. Being tired only makes the misery of spending my day there even worse.
*Sarah*